February 13

Real Love Means You Think of the Welfare of Others

Question: How can I learn to love?

Sri Gurudev: Wanting to love itself is the beginning. And if you want to love, then you should know how to love. Real love means you think of the welfare of others. You do everything for the sake of others. You don’t put yourself first. If others do something to you in return, it’s all right; accept it, but don’t look for it. If you look for it, you are setting up conditions. “Only if you love me in return or if you do this and this and that and that will I love you. Otherwise I will not.”

All our problems are caused by this. We lose trust and become miserable when love is conducted like a business. You will not be happy with this kind of love. Don’t worry about the other person. Whether it is between husband and wife or even between two friends, if your relationship is based on some gain from that person, you are never going to be happy. The other person cannot always give you what you want. So be content just to love.